Free bird

I was talking to Darby yesterday about his birds. Well actually he was talking to me about his plans to collect more birds and move to New York City. He wants Caiques and Conures, Macaws, and African grey parrots. He’s not satisfied with this little budgie he just got. He’s just getting started. 

 So we’re chatting as we’re driving to the grocery store. I took them with me just to get them out of the house. Yes they wore masks, and actually Cooper just stayed in the car and watched a movie while Darby and I got groceries. So again, he’s telling me about all these birds he’s going to collect and store in his room and all the cages he’s going to buy. And I’m thinking as I’m looking around at the wild birds I’m watching all around us as I drive “won’t they be sad they’re in captivity? I mean they’re birds after all, don’t birds love flying?” Darby responds that it’s better for them because they won’t die. Birds in captivity are healthier than wild birds because they won’t be attacked by other birds or get diseases. 

 A light goes on in my head and I realize this is the exact situation the worlds citizens are finding themselves in at this current moment in history. A new virus is present in the invisible air. In an effort to protect us, our owners have mandated that we must remain captives in our own cages. Yes, we can come out for food or a walk from time to time, just like Darby’s little budgie gets about 30 minutes of house flight in a single room per day. But it’s not the same as being free. 

 There is a risk to leaving our homes every single day, and that risk was just compounded by a new virus. There are many humans who want to stay in the cage for as long as they can. And other humans want to fly free. They don’t feel alive unless they’re flying. I understand that and I agree that it’s their right to fly free. Afterall, Darby technically owns his parakeet. But our governing authorities don’t own us, they actually work for us. We gave them the job. I wonder what Budgie would want if he chose Darby to take him. Would he want to fly free or stay put?

What do you do when you live in a tiny one room apartment with nothing but a bird and an electric guitar and your governor has deemed your work nonessential during a pandemic? You decide to master your electric guitar. One problem, Your bird hates your electric guitar . A choice was made. Darby was the lucky recipient of another mans decision to abandon his bird today. “One mans junk is another mans treasure??”

I want to remember this day as the day I drove illegally across the state to Brighton , Michigan with Search and Destroy while we were all wearing masks looking like we were about to rob a bank and ended up in a parking lot where we met a guy in a ski mask and full camo handing over this bird setup, including bird formerly known as “Gregg”.

I drove under the speed limit for a full 5 hours;first time in history. I didn’t want to be pulled over to have to explain my essential travel with a bird in my car.
No gas pumps were touched, no hands were shaken, not even an elbow bump. I did nearly hit a hawk on our drive back. It was inches from hitting my windshield, A little brake pump saved us From having another shattered windshield like the turkey incident a few years ago. Everything was free, Darby’s happy. Now if I can just find a para motor so my kid can fly to McDonald’s, this will be a quarantine time to remember.

A pair of birthdays

Birthdays are coming up in May for Search and Destroy. They’ve always had pretty lofty birthday requests. Darby wants a parakeet. Cooper wants a paramotor.

I just realized I have a “pair” of boys who want a “para”kete and a “para” motor...and a”parr”ently I cant get either because para motors are $5k and parakeets wont be sold again until 2021 due to corona . So now I have “pair” of disappointed boys. I don’t feel like a great “pare”nt  right now. #Covidbirthdays #tweenslearningpatience

Plagues

I started wearing a mask at meijers like a month ago or something . Not to brag, but I was one of the first ones to wear it, before the CDC recommended it , and I hated how awkward it made everything. Id smile at people in an attempt to feel normal and then realize what an idiot I was because my mouth was covered up. It just created this weird environment where people didn’t smile, or say hello, or have the nice grocery store chit chat id typically encounter....there’s just something about a plague that ruins everything amiright??.

At least I felt protected with this piece of cloth strapped to my face, whether it was scientifically preventing my death or not, I have no idea. It seemed like the logical measure for me to take.

All I could think about was what it’s like to be in my house in the middle of the day with the sun pouring in through the windows. You know that  time of day where  every single dust particle in the air is visible ? And I realized  that some strangers asymptomatic talking particles, or sneeze,  or cough,  or whatever, would stick to and be floating on those tiny air particles in the store and the only reason I wasn’t seeing  them was because the sun doesn’t shine inside meijers. And anyways,  I  didn’t want to inhale any of that...so there I was awkwardly smiling with a mask strapped to my head.

The first time I wore it, Yes it was awkward but At least I “felt” safe! The week before trip, the stores aisles had been  mobbed and we were all breathing all over each other. So I felt like I was making a good choice finally . It was a short lived experience though because when I showed up  to the register (before plexiglass was Installed), My  unmasked cashier started scanning my stuff and I say the usual “how’s it going?” And he responds, “well I’m working on my day off” and I’m like “oh that’s too bad you have to work because it’s so busy”. And he says “oh no, I picked up this shift because I was really sick Wednesday and I wanted the money ( this is on a Friday, 2 days past Wednesday...the day he was “really sick”) . “Oh did you have the flu?” I ask. “OH YEAH, I was REALLY sick, ALOT of congestion, fever, all of it” he says ....as he’s breathing his dust air particles all over my lettuce. I won’t lie, I thought about abandoning my groceries . I might as well have just pulled my mask off , set it on fire and let him sneeze in my face right there.  I haven’t died yet. The salad was good.

THEN, something amazing happened on my next trip, 10 days later!! More people started wearing masks , and plexiglass went up! I kept running into this other shopper gal with her mask on too, and ....she smiled at me! You know how I could tell??  Our eyes can smile!! 🙂 And that just really made me happy. So SMILE at people, make eye contact, it’s okay...your eyes can smile, they’ll know!! And everyone can use a smile from a stranger In these  socially distanced days we’re having.